Captain Jack Wycked Jack (James Jordan)

Captain Jack's moniker is courtesy of both the crew he commands and sailors of the Spanish Main whose galleons he preys upon. Wycked Jack is of Scotch-Irish heritage. Known only to his closest friend's as Seamus MacSiurtain his mother was an Irish princess with a fondness for a Scottish scoundrel pirate known as Mad Mac the Red.

In the mundane world Jim is an eccentrically unusual lad of Scotch-Irish descent. This means he'll get drunk with you but refuses to pay for it. He was born in a broken Pez dispenser and grew up in Mesquite, Texas, a sleepy little town whose motto was “We live here so you don’t have to.” Raised a Southern Baptist until he was old enough to know better his historically accurate youth gave him more than enough fodder for humor and sarcasm. He also won’t make love standing up for fear people will think he’s dancing.

A master of dialects and improv he has spent thousands of hours watching cartoons which constitute the bulk of his comedic training. “Nothing says funny like a 16-ton anvil on the head!” he’s prone to spout and boy howdy ain’t it the truth!

The victim of a public school system that refused to allow girls to wear blue jeans until 1976, Jim was prompted by his journalism and drama teachers to “get the hell out” and go on to college before he was a senior. Never one to turn down free advice (or food) he did just that and received a degree in communications with a minor in commercial photography. He went on to work in television and radio and later opened a photography studio. Jim moved to Minnesota in 1988 and has decided to stick it out. He now works as a web developer and investigator.

The Fun Goes Too Far!

After moving to Minnesota he went a little too far in his enjoyment of the Renaissance period and began acting out his fantasies at the Minnesota Renaissance Festival (MRF). One thing led to another and pretty soon he had more costumes than Liberace and more personalities than Sybil. During the last few years Jim worked at MRF in addition to acting as stage manager for local productions in Minneapolis, including a priestly role in Caliban Productions’ wonderfully acclaimed rewrite of Shakespeare’s “Two Noble Kynsmen” that garnered one of the spots in the “Best Top 10 Plays” in the Twin Cities.

In addition to acting like he’s acting, Jim is also a 'semi-talented' hand drummer playing such age-old instruments as the doumbek, djembe, congas and bodhrán and has been stumbling through tunes on the Irish whistle. He can be seen playing with local street musicians, drumming for gypsies and playing a big bass in drum jams. He's also a drum circle facilitator with Drum Quest, a local hand drumming organization he founded.

Appearances & Roles

Back

Wycked Jack'S STATS:

Turn Ons: Chocolate, music, the sea, the North Shore.  booty, women... and women with chocolate on 'em! Starbucks Mocha Frappuchinos,

Turn Offs: Bigots, prejudice,   ignorance, arrogance, circus midgets, sock puppets, bloated government and being keelhauled. 

Favorite Food: All of them except Brussel sprouts - Sweet Mother Mary how I hate those stinky sprouts!

Favorite Pickup Line: "Do you have any Irish in you? Would you like some?!"

Goals: To be the most famous pyrate in history right behind the IRS!

Advice: "Don't lie, cheat or steal unnecessarily."

Best Quote: "I like to get out of trouble as fast as I can get into it!"

And...

"You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests she is pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment." - I know this... NOW!